Big-O-Bag of Candy... And Two Pumpkins!
Forgot to mention that yesterday, on Halloween day, I had a big disappointment.
Last year on this very same day I was home after a night of celebrations, trying to remember all the events of the previous night, when I heard some noise outside. That noise was followed by a very timid knock on the door and an explosion of kids singing the "trick or treat".
I, my friends, didn't have a single piece of candy in my condo, not even frikking sugar to give away, neither had those chicken cubes that you use to cook with and that could've passed as candy. I had nothing, nada! And those little devils outside my door were eager to get their share of candy at any price.
Of course I didn't do what a good God fearing Christian would've done in a situation like this: to open the door and say "sorry kids, but I forgot to buy candy. . . by the way, nice customs!". Hell no, I duck under my dining table and pretended that there was no one home.
Those little kids almost knock down my door asking for their poison! I swear I could feel for a moment those were not really little kids but zombies coming after me with their little pitchforks and plastic axes and swords.
But I learnt my lesson, and this year I got me a big-O-bag of candies with plenty of all those harmful chemicals and altered flavors and colors that are so appealing to kids these days, and put them in a basket right by the door. I even got me two pumpkins and carved one with a very evil face and lighted some candles, just to give my condo a Halloween touch. And can you believe that not a single little devil shows up asking for candy? WTF! And no, is not that they skipped my door, kids don't have that good of a memory when it comes to soliciting candies, because I didn't even heard them knocking on either of my neighbors doors.
So there I was, all hungover and shit but with a Halloween spirit still intact and no one to share it with. Anyway I'm gona save all that candy and would give it away next year if I'm still around this Strange Land, luckily it all would've expired by then and I could teach them a frikking lesson: eat your fucking veggies and leave people alone.
Damn! Am I an ogre or what?!
Last year on this very same day I was home after a night of celebrations, trying to remember all the events of the previous night, when I heard some noise outside. That noise was followed by a very timid knock on the door and an explosion of kids singing the "trick or treat".
I, my friends, didn't have a single piece of candy in my condo, not even frikking sugar to give away, neither had those chicken cubes that you use to cook with and that could've passed as candy. I had nothing, nada! And those little devils outside my door were eager to get their share of candy at any price.
Of course I didn't do what a good God fearing Christian would've done in a situation like this: to open the door and say "sorry kids, but I forgot to buy candy. . . by the way, nice customs!". Hell no, I duck under my dining table and pretended that there was no one home.
Those little kids almost knock down my door asking for their poison! I swear I could feel for a moment those were not really little kids but zombies coming after me with their little pitchforks and plastic axes and swords.
But I learnt my lesson, and this year I got me a big-O-bag of candies with plenty of all those harmful chemicals and altered flavors and colors that are so appealing to kids these days, and put them in a basket right by the door. I even got me two pumpkins and carved one with a very evil face and lighted some candles, just to give my condo a Halloween touch. And can you believe that not a single little devil shows up asking for candy? WTF! And no, is not that they skipped my door, kids don't have that good of a memory when it comes to soliciting candies, because I didn't even heard them knocking on either of my neighbors doors.
So there I was, all hungover and shit but with a Halloween spirit still intact and no one to share it with. Anyway I'm gona save all that candy and would give it away next year if I'm still around this Strange Land, luckily it all would've expired by then and I could teach them a frikking lesson: eat your fucking veggies and leave people alone.
Damn! Am I an ogre or what?!
Jean-Francois was drunk at 10:56 PM
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