Downstairs People

Got home last night around 8PM after I gulp down quite a few glasses of wine and noticed that my downstairs neighbor had left the keys on the door. This is a new neighbor who moved in just a few days, or perhaps weeks ago, and as I noticed that he is not a pretty young girl but an old-ass guy with a lot of free time in his hands, I wasn't even planning to say hi.

But as I am such a cool guy, I knocked on the door to let him know in a very polite way about the keys. It took him ten minutes to open the damn door, yelling like five times "coming", "hold on" and so on. Maybe he had the porn cranked at full speed in his TV or maybe he was cutting the stuff into one gram bags or who knows what. When finally he came out, I just pointed at the keys on the door saying "you left the keys on the door". This guy barely noticed the keys hanging from the door knob but instead he started shaking my hand and introducing himself and asking me if I had cats because he loves cats and that this is such a nice place and so on. I pointed out that I don't "own any pets" and tried not to say much, but when I said my name "Jean-Francois" he started chewing some words in French and started asking me about my origins and background. I reply "that's a long story", a very polite way of saying "it's not your fucking business".

I hope he doesn't end up like my other downstairs neighbor, a nice old lady that everytime she sees me she stars talking non-stop recounting the same stories over and over again.