I'm Fucking Brilliant!

I know that I'm brilliant, but sometimes I even get to amaze myself. I figure out today that instead of sending a cold and tasteless e-mail, what I can do is to hand write a note, scan it, send it as an attachment and voila! Instant delivery! Am I fucking something or what?
I know that I have had my scanner/printer seating on my desk right beside my laptop for almost six months now, and somehow I feel kind of stupid for not figuring it out before, but well, better late than never, right?

I just sent this note to my best girlfriend, who's back in South America. Lately we have been kind of "out of touch" and the last e-mails that we exchange were frankly pathetic. In one of those she wrote only in the subject line and nothing in the message itself; I reply with one word. So I can tell that we were heading to a little fight over the lack of quality communication and I could see both of us wasting our energy in the blaming game:

- You didn't reply my e-mail!
- You call one word message an "e-mail"?
- I did reply, didn't I?!
- You don't love me anymore. You forgot about me!
- I did? When was the last time blah, blah, blah
- blah, blah, blah
- blah, blah, blah

So, as I am a very smart guy I was thinking what to do to stop short that coming storm. And even though I know that I'm right (you can check out some of the posts that I've written about my e-mails and her e-mails), I also remember very well my class of "Negotiation and Conflict Resolution" in the MBA and the techniques learnt to minimize the escalation of conflict. I was thinking about what to do to make her feel closer to me without having to use an e-mail or a phone call; how to make her lower her guard, and punch her in the nose and knock her down and kiss her and touch her and Hug her and make her mind right there time and again and whisper in her ear all kind of nasty things together with plenty of I love u's... in one single message. I was thinking about a letter but that's too much too late, when suddenly my mind was struck with the image of a had written note, scanned and sent it out to her. In the very same second I pictured her reading it, laughing, crying and getting mad at me because she knows that I am three steps ahead of her. FUCK am I smart or what? This is the note and down below the translation. Enjoy it!



Hello Amix!
What's happening? How's life treating you these days? Could you believe that today I found out that I can write you a note, scan it and send it out to you? There's no need for us to exchange those cold and tasteless e-mails.
Honestly I feel kind of stupid for not doing it before; but at the same time I feel fucking brilliant for "figuring it out by myself". What do you think?
I'm fine over here, I really can't complain. Fall is here and Charlotte looks beautiful, which reminds me that winter is coming together with snow skiing!
Tell me about you. How's everything?
I love you little silly,
Jean-Francois